Sunday, October 7, 2012

Run From The Cure

Run From The Cure

I wish I had known about hemp oil for Brad. I'm in the middle of redesigning my protocol, and am going to start using hemp oil as soon as I get a legal prescription and find the best source to buy it from.  I'm also adding Essiac tea, and MSM.  Gentle Qigong daily, and a few other things. (I'll add them to this page later)

I'm not using the rife machine specifically for cancer treatment anymore. I think it's tricky to "guess" which frequencies to use, and if the wrong one is used, it tends to aggravate the cancer or cause it to worsen. Not a good option for a person who's self-treating, too much guess work and too much specific knowledge required. I am impressed with how well it kills parasites though, and  I think it's great for other uses as well. But it's complicated to use for cancer treatment. I don't recommend it.

I'm starting to have sporadic pain now, mostly at night unfortunately. It's bad enough to keep me awake. I usually get up and smoke some medicinal organic humboldt herb, and put an ice pack on. That usually works. It's true that marijuana is a good painkiller. I'll be glad to use the extract instead.

I should've went to church today so I could pray (ha ha just kidding) that the next rental has an actual useable bathtub. I use the tub for therapeutic baths, makes a major difference. (Dear Lord, let me have a damn bathtub, you can keep the Mercedes Benz !! )

Two or three years ago,  I asked my chinese medicine doctor, Well, what do you think? Do you think I'm going to live? His answer was, Well, you haven't made up your mind yet. I thought about that for a long time and I knew he was right. After Brad died, I stopped embracing life, stopped making plans for a future, stopped everything except for what I had to do to survive. If I had a passion it was to do whatever I could to ensure the crooks who stole from us would have a better chance of getting caught. The research I did was tiring but it was also engaging.. It was like putting together a big puzzle about all these things I didn't know about my husband's life. It was also interesting to get an inside look on the mortgage fraud party going on in America.  But, it didn't make me want to live.

I used to make a joke, saying, "These fools sure didn't do their research well. They just really pissed off a Christensen, how stupid is that? Any member of this clan WILL live just to hunt you down." I am after all my father's daughter. He was never intimidated. He was in fact, the epitome of a teamster union truck driver from the 70's. and all that implies.. Larger than life. He taught his children to stand up, to be the difference.

 I understood that aspect of myself in connection to my father much more distinctly after a psychotherapist I knew counseled me briefly. He didn't charge me an hourly rate, but gave me counsel from his heart, which of course is the best and most direct kind. (Thanks Paul. I'll always remember you. You helped me open that door.)

But I'm a lot smaller than my Dad was, and sometimes I make people mad. So I've decided that when this cancer business is primarily over I'm going to get serious about learning better self-defense, maybe even some offense.

1 comment: